"Charisma" by Tony Alessandra

In my never-ending quest to be able to give speeches, presentations, and interact in social situations, I ran across "Charisma: Seven Keys to Developing the Magnetism that Leads to Success" by Tony Alessandra. It really does a decent job presenting seven elements that charismatic people exhibit, and gives pointers to help apply those elements to you. Here I present a simple outline; I really do recommend reading the book for the full effect.

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What is charisma? It is the quality that creates leaders. If people like you, even though they don't know much about you, you have charisma. Assess your amount of charisma by examining its seven elements:

1. Your Silent Message - This is how you carry yourself. It can be broken down into five categories:
   • Your Emotional Self
   • Your Psychological Self
   • Your Intellectual Self
   • Your Spiritual Self
   • Your Physical Self
2. Speaking With Authority - Know your material backwards and forwards. Follow these steps for preparation:
   • Identify Your Purpose
   • Know Your Audience
   • Know Your Material
   • Focus on the Big Idea
   • Get Your Audience's Attention and Keep It
   • Practice and Visualize
3. Listening Skills - People listen at four basic levels of awareness:
   • Non-Listener (No effort to hear)
   • Marginal (Hears, but misses the meaning)
   • Technical (Makes and effort to hear, but not understand)
   • Active (Focuses on understanding)
   To become an active listener, focus on:
   • Concentrating
   • Acknowledging
   • Researching
   • Controlling Emotions
   • Sensing Non-Verbal Messages
   • Structuring
4. Power of Persuasion - Understanding the "need gap" - the difference between the current situation and the desired one:
   • Discover Needs and Goals
   • Create a Solution
   • Commit to an Action Plan
   • Identify, Monitor, and Measure Results
5. Use of Time and Space
   • In casual conversation, sit at right angles to facilitate gesturing and eye contact
   • In formal conversation, use a desk or table as a safety barrier to monitor non-verbals
   • Someone who is distracted by your behavior doesn't hear your message
   • Be aware of others' needs for personal space
   • Showing up late sends the message that you don't think their time is valuable; showing up early sends the message that yours isn't.
6. Adapability - If you can identify someone's personality style, you can improve communication and build rapport:
   • Directors (dominant, take charge)
   • Socializers (fast paced, fun loving)
   • Relaters (people-oriented)
   • Thinkers (result-oriented, problem solvers)
7. Vision - A visionary idea appeals to the values and needs of the people you seek to lead.
   • A mission will give purpose, context, and stamina to your vision
   • Setting and accomplishing goals is necessary to achieve your vision